All Cheerleaders Die (2013)

By Wuchak

***Weak first act and confusing/ugly vibe hamper wannabe hip horror (non)comedy*** Four cheerleaders (Caitlin Stasey, Brooke Butler, Amanda Grace Benitez & Reanin Johannink) rise from the dead with the help of a wiccan teen (Sianoa Smit-McPhee) to exact revenge on several football players at a school in Southern Cal. You can tell that “All Cheerleaders Die” (2013) is a remake of the director/writer duo ’s 2001 indie of the same name because it’s reminiscent of horror flicks of the late 90s, like “The Rage: Carrie 2” (1999), “The Craft” (1996), "The Faculty" (1998), “Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2” (2000) and “Ginger Snaps” (2000) mixed with bits of “Carnival of Souls” (1962/1998) and “Dawn of the Dead” (1978). Unfortunately, it’s the least of these because the campy opening is neither compelling nor amusing and the movie doesn’t get interesting until the midpoint. The flick is confused about what it wants to be and strapped with a confusing script coupled with a lame docudrama vibe. Meanwhile the tame Sapphic twaddle doesn’t help. Still, most of the actresses cited above have their unique appeal and there are some entertaining aspects. The creators just need to learn how to tell a compelling story with worthy protagonists that’s less befuddling, not to mention grasp how to execute amusement. The film runs 1 hour, 29 minutes, and was shot in Los Angeles. GRADE: C/C-